Black Friday...

Yesterday my mom and I got up at 4:30 to go shopping. I was VERY disappointed to be honest. We left many stores empty handed which wasn't expected! I didn't even spend $100.00 so it's got me thinking that maybe next year I wont be getting up so early to go shopping lol. Today we went to the mall to do some more shopping and actually found more good deals there than we did on Friday. After the mall we went to Ross and my mom was looking for some jeans. I acutally found a pair of maternity jeans that were cute (not like my other ones) and some warmer long sleeved maternity shirts. I wasn't going to buy them but my dad said I should because the jeans were the only pair there (in that color) and they didnt have too many long sleeved shirts and all I have left over from my last pregnancy is tee shirts. I was afraid I'd "jinx" myself if I bought maternity clothes this early but my mom said that wouldn't happen lol so I'm hoping she's right! I can't wait to wear them! I've been feeling good lately. I haven't really been sick like I was when I was pregnant with Carson. Sometimes I feel sick to my stomach but if I do it never lasts long. It's so weird how every pregnancy is so different. I'm excited that tomorrow is December 1st. December 10th can't get here fast enough! Hopefully everything will go well :) Anyways just wanted to write a quick update. I'm going to head to bed! Hope everyone is having a great weekend!

Excited but nervous...

Today was Carson's due date. We miss him so very much! I wish more than anything that he could be with us but I feel like we got this BFP because of him. I feel like he wanted me to be pregnant again and like he's telling me it's okay. I love him sooooo much!! I miss my baby :( Yesterday I got my BFP. I am sooooooo happy but also very nervous. I just keep praying that everything is going to go okay this time, but I'm so scared it wont. With Carson I took two pregnancy tests. This time I only had 1 so I just took that one and didn't buy anymore. I was just on babycenter.com and read several posts about chemical pregnancies. Now I'm freaking out that something like this is going to happen to me! :( I reallllyyy hope it doesn't! I can't stop thinking about my ultrasound on the 10th. I really hope the days go by fast because I'm driving myself insane wondering if everything is okay. Maybe I'm so nervous because the last time we went in for an ultrasound was the day we found out Carson had passed away. I just hope when we go in that Dr. Batig will tell us everything looks great!! I truly believe that this is our Thanksgiving blessing and I hope this little bean sticks! I know it seeme like I'm obsessing over this but I just want so badly for this baby to be healthy and to have a uneventful pregnancy!! I'm trying not to stress but it's hard to celebrate until we know for sure everything's okay. I'm so tempted to tell my parents tomorrow but I haven't decided when I'm going to tell them yet. After I have my ultrasound I'm going to ask the doctor if it's safe to tell everyone because they'll be able to see a heart beat at 6 weeks and if it is I think we'll send out Christmas cards telling everyone! Well I better get off here I'm sooo tired. I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving tomorrow and happy shopping to those who are going to go out on Black Friday! I'm excited for all the deals haha. Goodnight!

BFP!!!!!!

I'M PREGNANT!!!!!! My period was due today and I had a feeling that I was going to get a negative test result so I didn't even want to test. I woke up this morning at 4:30 and didn't have to pee so after I layed there for 15 minutes I realized I wouldn't be able to sleep if I didn't take the test. I went and drank a couple glasses of water then took the test. My heart was pounding so fast just thinking about the results. I had to go in the other room so I wouldn't peak at it early. lol When I went back into the bathroom and picked up the test there was my positive result! I was so shocked!! I started crying I was so happy!! I can't believe God has blessed us again! We are so lucky! I just hope this pregnancy goes smoothly. I honestly can't handle losing another baby to either miscarriage or another still birth. It's just too hard. I am so excited about being pregnant. After I found out this morning I wasn't able to go back to sleep so I surfed the internet and found out that my estimated due date is Tuesday August 4th 2009! It really is amazing that God answered our prayers. Tomorrow is Carson's due date so of course November is a hard month for us and to be blessed with a new baby on the way is going to help make this month a little easier. Not to mention the new baby is also due in August a week before Carson was born. I think Carson is watching over us and really wanted this to happen! I am so excited about being pregnant again but I am also so scared and nervous at the same time. I have already said countless prayers that everything will go okay. On December 10th I have two doctor's appointments. The first one is with my high risk OB and he's going to do an ultrasound to make sure the pregnancy is viable. If it is (Which I have faith that it will be) then he's going to put me on my blood thinners. My second appointment is just an intake appointment where I fill out TONS of paperwork and get blood work done. So far I've only told my two best friends Tiffany and Christy. I also told my good friend Erin. Chris has told a couple of his friends but other than that no one knows. We're going to wait til after out appointment on the 10th to start telling people. I might even wait to tell my parents and brother until Christmas so we can do something neat to tell them. We'll see! I'm keeping Tiffany in my prayers every night. I hope she gets pregnant this next month so we can be pregnant together!! Well I better get to bed I've been up since 4:30 am and I have a second interview tomorrow at that weight loss place! I really hope I get the job! Hope everyone has a great night!!

Update...

My interview went great and I'm supposed to hear back from her this week and see if she needs me to come back in for a second interview. I'm hoping I get the job! We'll see :)

This weekend we went to Packwood to visit my parents and go through Christmas stuff. They gave us a bunch of stuff that they don't have room for and I cooked the family an early Thanksgiving dinner since I've never been able to cook one for Chris before. We also took some pictures this weekend and we'll probably use the one I posted on here for our Christmas card. I'm excited for the holidays but sad at the same time since Carson should be here :( Our house is already all decorated for Christmas...we even have our tree up. I know it's early but since Chris got home right before Christmas last year we weren't able to put the tree up together so we were excited to do that together. Plus he's also big into Christmas like I am so we couldn't wait to decorate! I can't believe how fast this year has gone! Hopefully next year will be better :)

Tomorrow my period is due but I'm going to take a pregnancy test in the morning. I REALLY hope I get a positiive but I have a feeling I wont. I don't want to get my hopes up. I have some things that are similar to when I found out I was pregnant with Carson but each pregnancy is different. We could really use the good news this month since Carson was due the 26th but I just have a feng it's not going to happen :(

I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving and a safe trip if they're traveling anywhere! I better get off the computer...it's getting late and I'm really tired. Hopefully everyone has a good night :)

My upcoming interview...

Last week I sent my resume to a woman for a job at a weight loss clinic in Olympia. I got a call back today and I have an interview tomorrow at 3:00 pm. I am sooooooo excited! I would love to work at this weight loss clinic. I know I haven't had the interview yet but it sounds perfect! It isn't far way and it's part time so the hours are perfect. She said the job could turn into a full time position which would also be nice. I'd love the extra $$$$$$ lol. I really think I'd be able to relate to the clients who are trying to lose weight. Not only am I trying to lose the rest of my baby weight but I've gone to a weight loss clinic (run by the same company just down in Longview) and I was able to lose 40 lbs! I would love to help people lose weight and achieve their goals of weight loss! I don't want to get my hopes up about this job but I'm keeping my fingers crossed!! Hopefully it goes well and I'll be sure to update everyone tomorrow after my interview.

Next week on the 26th is Carson's due date. I know it's going to be a very hard day for us but hopefully we'll be able to do something nice to remember Carson by. I miss him sooooo much :( I pray every night that Carson knows how much we love him and miss him.

Well I'm going to get off here and start a load of laundry. I need to wash my clothes that I'm going to wear to my interview tomorrow! Hope everyone is having a great week!

Finals

Today I spent like 3 hours straight studying for my finals tomorrow. Well it's actually just one test but it's 250 questions and they give you 3.5 hours to take it. I'm soooo nervous. I'm taking online Medical Terminology and there's a lot of stuff that you have to memorize. Since I've had so much on my mind since my class started a couple weeks after Carson was born, that I've had a hard time just sitting down and studying. I do my homework and all my assignments and quizs with no problem but I HATE sitting down to memorize prefixes, suffixes and combining forms! I might study a little more tomorrow morning before I get on the computer and take the quiz. I'm lucky that I can look stuff up in my book or notes if I'm stuck on a question since it's an online class. Hopefully the final wont be too tough and I'll get a good grade. I can't wait to be done with school :) Well I better get to bed since I have a big test tomorrow. Hope everyone's having a good night and I'm so glad tomorrow's Friday. I can't wait to sleep in on the weekend! YAY!

Update

Today is 2 weeks away from what would have been my due date. I would be 38 weeks pregnant right now. Its crazy to think about. It seems like Carson was born soooo long ago but tomorrow it will be 3 months since he was born. Life can change in an instant, and it's just not fair! It seems like evvverryooone is pregnant right now. A friend of Chris' from back home just had her baby on Monday. She was actually due around the time I was but had to have a c-section early. Tonight before we went to my friend Erin's house for dinner, I took an OPK and got my first positive result. I was sooo excited. Hopefully this will be the month! I really hope it happens for Tiffany this month too! I'm excited to be pregnant together. I really could use some good news right now. Then the baby would be due in August around Carson's birthday. We had fun catching up over at Erin's tonight. It was nice to hang out with friends. I have finals this week with school and I'm NOT looking forward to them. It's only one test but it's 250 questions and they give you 3.5 hours to take it. Hopefully I'll do good! After I'm done with this class I'll go back to Clover Park and register for Medical Terminology II and start that the first Monday in December. Well I just wanted to post a quick update before I go to bed. I'm going to finish watching Dog the Bounty Hunter....it makes me miss Hawaii !!!

My day with Brent and Tiffany

Last Wednesday Tiffany came down for the day to hang out with Brent and I. We ran some errands and had lunch at Panera (it was sooo good!). As you can see in the picture Brent really liked the lemon from Tiffany's drink haha He made that face every time he tried it but he wouldn't put it down. I had a lot of fun watching Brent last week. It made me want a baby even more haha. Having him gave Tiffany and I a great reason to go to Babies R Us so we spent some time looking at all the neat baby stuff and saying like a million times "I can't wait to get pregnant". lol We got some vitamins called Origin for Women and I'm excited to try them. They're supposed to help you get pregnant faster....we'll see. I haven't started taking them yet because I don't want to get too much folic acid so I'm waiting to talk to my doctor and see if it's okay to take my other vitamins with it. Hopefully these vitamins will be some kind of miracle drug and Tiffany and I will be knocked up this month! haha

This month is already starting to get tough for me and it's only the beginning of the month! I talked to Ashley and she understands why I wont be going to her baby shower. I'm so lucky she's so understanding. Of course she wasn't mad or anything. I'm going to go shopping this week for a baby gift though. She's registered at a few places so I'll probably check out Target and see what I can find. I swear EVERYONE and their dog is pregnant! I just found out that Chris' cousin LeighAnne is pregnant and my cousin's wife Jessica is pregnant. That makes 4 total cousins who are pregnant. NOT FAIR. Everyone keeps telling me that my time will come and blah blah but I wish it would hurry up and be MY turn. Maybe I'm just stressing so much because we got pregnant so fast with Carson. It took us only a little over 2 months and we didn't even know when I was ovulating or anything! This is our 2nd month trying so I'm praying that it happens just as fast. With no miscarriages and a healthy baby!

Tonight Chris has CQ. I hate when he has to work for 24 hours. Especially on a Saturday. I'm soooo freaking bored! In a little while I'm going to run to the commissary and pick him up some snacks and some Sushi (for me...YUM), then I'll go pick him up some Chinese and go have dinner with him. I'll probably hang out there for a little while then head home to watch some movies. Woo. So exciting for a Saturday night huh? Well I better get off here and go to the store. I'm starting to get hungry. Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Trying to stay positive

Me and Ashley (and baby Austin)

Last night we went out to dinner with the Woodruff's. It went well and we had a lot of fun. I'm sad that they're moving :( It was a little easier to be around Ashley than I expected, although it was still really hard. She looks sooo cute with her belly! I can't wait until it's my turn!!! I think the hardest part of the evening was all the baby talk non-stop. It was pretty much all we talked about. I really hope that November is our month because I am sooooo ready to be pregnant again. I think one reason I'm so jealous of her, is I never got the big ol' belly ( I was barley showing with Carson) and I never got to feel him kick. I felt him move a couple times but never a kick. My plan right now is to just stay positive and not stress about getting pregnant (because that will only make it harder). I'm trying to focus on school and losing weight to keep my mind off things. I have Tiffany to blame (well more like thank) for my addiction to babycenter.com. It's great!! I love the TTC groups. It's so nice to know that there's other people out there going through the same thing. I'm excited to hang out with Tiffany this week! Maybe we'll hit up Boarders :) Well I better get off the computer. I haven't done anything all morning so I better get started on my homework. After Chris is done watching football we have to go get his hair cut. Other than that we're just having a lazy Sunday. Hope everyone had a GREAT weekend!