Excited but nervous...

Today was Carson's due date. We miss him so very much! I wish more than anything that he could be with us but I feel like we got this BFP because of him. I feel like he wanted me to be pregnant again and like he's telling me it's okay. I love him sooooo much!! I miss my baby :( Yesterday I got my BFP. I am sooooooo happy but also very nervous. I just keep praying that everything is going to go okay this time, but I'm so scared it wont. With Carson I took two pregnancy tests. This time I only had 1 so I just took that one and didn't buy anymore. I was just on babycenter.com and read several posts about chemical pregnancies. Now I'm freaking out that something like this is going to happen to me! :( I reallllyyy hope it doesn't! I can't stop thinking about my ultrasound on the 10th. I really hope the days go by fast because I'm driving myself insane wondering if everything is okay. Maybe I'm so nervous because the last time we went in for an ultrasound was the day we found out Carson had passed away. I just hope when we go in that Dr. Batig will tell us everything looks great!! I truly believe that this is our Thanksgiving blessing and I hope this little bean sticks! I know it seeme like I'm obsessing over this but I just want so badly for this baby to be healthy and to have a uneventful pregnancy!! I'm trying not to stress but it's hard to celebrate until we know for sure everything's okay. I'm so tempted to tell my parents tomorrow but I haven't decided when I'm going to tell them yet. After I have my ultrasound I'm going to ask the doctor if it's safe to tell everyone because they'll be able to see a heart beat at 6 weeks and if it is I think we'll send out Christmas cards telling everyone! Well I better get off here I'm sooo tired. I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving tomorrow and happy shopping to those who are going to go out on Black Friday! I'm excited for all the deals haha. Goodnight!